Maybe I Have a Disorder or Something....

As we shared our souls, I breathed you in. Somehow... I'm not exactly sure how... you all became an intrinsic part of my DNA. As we walked together, our beings unified in some pseudo-spiritual-crazy-moon-lady sort of way. I know all of your smiles, your quirks, your laughs; I probably can guess what you all are thinking by various looks of your faces. This fills me with joy. Intimacy of this nature is beautiful. I am a part of you, and you.... you all are a part of me. So much so that the very thought of any one of you fills me to the brim with a burning passion of mixed things such as a longing to see you, the memories we have, the potential within you... etc etc etc.

I always want to relive our times together; I want to create new times together.....I feel abnormally connected. Obsessed, if you will. Phone calls do no justice. I want to touch you, to see you, to smell you.

I would throw in "tasting" for the sake of meeting all the senses, but I cannot see these friendships progressing into mutually licking relationships...

Normal people don't think this way. Normal people don't think that others become an integral part of their very being. But I can't help it. I can't help seeing your intrinsic value. I can't help being thrilled by your individual characteristics. I can't help being impressed with the goodness you bring to the world surrounding you. I can't help but think there is nothing that tear you out of who I am.

I want all of you around me all the time. Perhaps that is heaven, for I cannot think of anything more beautiful.

Satire Births Truth

This is simply one of the best things I have ever read.

I'm Not One Of Those 'Love Thy Neighbor' Christians

By Janet Cosgrove
Christian
November 19, 2008 | Issue 44•47

Everybody has this image of "crazy Christians" based on what they hear in the media, but it's just not true. Most Christians are normal, decent folks. We don't all blindly follow a bunch of outdated biblical tenets or go all fanatical about every bit of dogma. What I'm trying to say is, don't let the actions of a vocal few color your perceptions about what the majority of us are like.

Like me. I may be a Christian, but it's not like I'm one of those wacko "love your neighbor as yourself " types.

God forbid!

I'm here to tell you there are lots of Christians who aren't anything like the preconceived notions you may have. We're not all into "turning the other cheek." We don't spend our days committing random acts of kindness for no credit. And although we believe that the moral precepts in the Book of Leviticus are the infallible word of God, it doesn't mean we're all obsessed with extremist notions like "righteousness" and "justice."

My faith in the Lord is about the pure, simple values: raising children right, saying grace at the table, strictly forbidding those who are Methodists or Presbyterians from receiving communion because their beliefs are heresies, and curing homosexuals. That's all. Just the core beliefs. You won't see me going on some frothy-mouthed tirade about being a comfort to the downtrodden.

I'm a normal Midwestern housewife. I believe in the basic teachings of the Bible and the church. Divorce is forbidden. A woman is to be an obedient subordinate to the male head of the household. If a man lieth down with another man, they shall be taken out and killed. Things everybody can agree on, like the miracle of glossolalia that occurred during Pentecost, when the Apostles were visited by the Holy Spirit, who took the form of cloven tongues of fire hovering just above their heads. You know, basic common sense stuff.

But that doesn't mean I think people should, like, forgive the sins of those who trespass against them or anything weird like that.

We're not all "Jesus Freaks" who run around screaming about how everyone should "Judge not lest ye be judged," whine "Blessed are the meek" all the time, or drone on and on about how we're all equal in the eyes of God! Some of us are just trying to be good, honest folks who believe the unbaptized will roam the Earth for ages without the comfort of God's love when Jesus Christ our Lord and Savior returns on Judgment Day to whisk the righteous off to heaven.

Now, granted, there are some Christians on the lunatic fringe who take their beliefs a little too far. Take my coworker Karen, for example. She's way off the deep end when it comes to religion: going down to the homeless shelter to volunteer once a month, donating money to the poor, visiting elderly shut-ins with the Meals on Wheels program—you name it!

But believe me, we're not all that way. The people in my church, for the most part, are perfectly ordinary Americans like you and me. They believe in the simple old-fashioned traditions—Christmas, Easter, the slow and deliberate takeover of more and more county school boards to get the political power necessary to ban evolution from textbooks statewide. That sort of thing.

We oppose gay marriage as an abomination against the laws of God and America, we're against gun control, and we fervently and unwaveringly believe that the Jews, Muslims, and all on earth who are not born-again Pentecostalists are possessed by Satan and should be treated as such.

When it comes down to it, all we want is to see every single member of the human race convert to our religion or else be condemned by a jealous and wrathful God to suffer an eternity of agony and torture in the Lake of Fire!

I hope I've helped set the record straight, and I wish you all a very nice day! God bless you.


Thank you, Onion, for your beautiful satire!

This article can be found in its original context at:
http://www.theonion.com/content/opinion/im_not_one_of_those_love_thy

It really can't get more cliche than Sunrises and Sunsets...

I watched the sunrise a long time ago, today. I remember the cold as I watched the pink streaks of sky reach around the foothills like fingers on a mission to crush darkness. More importantly, I remember my source of warmth that shared my blanket.... Anxiousness and relief, excitement and calm, worry and contentment somehow mixed into a tangible joy that burst forth from within me.

Since that long lost sunrise I have learned an incredible amount of knowledge. I have learned that life is slightly more complicated that I would expect when I am shouting so loud that I think my own voice is the voice of God. I have also learned that God will work in whatever situation I get myself in....He is just THAT faithful. I have learned what love feels like, and in trying to act out what it looks like, I have seen glimpses of truth. I have learned that I am not perfect, but that doesn't mean that I am not beautiful, lovable, or good. I have learned what the perfect laugh sounds like. I have learned that a struggle can still have joy within it. I have felt more vulnerable than I have ever felt in my entire life, and I have lived to tell about it. I have learned that my interpretation is not always the right one. I have learned that sometimes, I am too stubborn. I have learned that I try to have control over everything.

I watched the sun set today. It seemed to be the appropriate action. A comfortable loneliness embraced me as I watched the darkness win the eternal battle of the sky. The colors, though... Sadness can be overpowered by awe-inspiring visuals. This wistful sunset was mixed with chaos and beauty, and hopeful ends of anticipated returns. God whispers in my ear an eternal love that is much larger than anything I can possibly fathom, reminding me that all this, the sunrises, the sunsets, the emotions, the lessons.... these belong to him. From this seeming disorder something magnificent and beautiful will arise. Another sunrise and another sunset are on their way, full of new lessons and new life.

No More Pedestals, for I am Muddled.

Surely the mountains are too large and too daunting.
Initiative was never a strength, passing them officially seems impossible.
If you were going to try, I feel as if you would have already tried.
I try to reconcile in my mind the possibility or lack of possibility, but my attempt for some sort of mental control drives me more crazy than if I just let it be unknown.
Just when anger, disappointment, and reality formed into the ability to give up, I was pushed back into a downward spiral of hope.
.....Right after I tried to be someone that I surely was not......
The sad thing is, if this hope is ushered forward, I probably will be unsure and critical.
There is too much.... it is too hard... and it is not worth it for you...
perhaps that is the esteem talking there, but really...

I am just going to think about something else.